By Sam M. Lucero
Catholic Herald

Life has new meaning for couple after adopting twins

DOBIE -- Tears of sadness have been replaced by tears of joy for Kate Sloot, one of the newest moms at Our Lady of Lourdes Parish.

After years of hoping and praying that children would grace her life, Kate's prayers were answered last July. Through adoption, Kate and Vince Sloot's perseverance was rewarded -- twofold.

Michael and Rachel Sloot were born July 26. Two days later Kate and Vince were united with their new twins.

Since that day, life has changed dramatically for the Sloots, who live on a farm in rural Barron County. Priorities have changed, schedules have changed, and daily routines have changed. But through the late night feedings, extra laundry, and diaper changings, life has never been more exciting, the couple said.

Their excitement stems, in a small part, from a longing to open their home to children of another racial background. The Sloots say their love for Michael and Rachel -- who are African-American -- has no regard for skin color.

That same love, along with a strong Catholic upbringing, will help their children through any challenge they may encounter in a community with few racial or ethnic minorities, the couple added.The journey to motherhood was a long and anxious one for Kate, who recalls attending Mother's Day Masses and shedding tears of sadness when moms in the congregation were asked to stand and be recognized.

After she met and married her husband Vince in 1997, Kate's dream of holding her own child seemed to be within reach.

But even after consulting with a Catholic fertility doctor and following prescribed church approved fertility methods, the couple couldn't conceive. Their dream of raising a family remained distant.

"I envisioned myself as a mom for so many years," said Kate. "I felt one way or another God would provide us with children."

Although they waited two years before beginning the adoption process, both Kate and Vince said they had long believed an adopted child was in their future.

"I had thoughts about adopting long before I had ever met Kate. Where that came from I don't know," said Vince. "Then when we were dating, we shared that we each had that same thought."

After deciding they would try to adopt, the Sloots gathered information about adoption agencies and contacted Crossroads Adoption of Wisconsin in February 2000.

"We had our first meeting with them in March and our home study was completed the first week of June," said Kate. The adoption process involves a lot of paperwork and extensive background checking, she added. "They also visit your home to check it out and make sure it's a safe place." In addition, the couple had to write a 10-page report about their lives.

Kate explained that Crossroads Adoption put them in touch with another agency that brings adoptive parents and children together.

One day after the agency received the couple's file, they contacted the Sloots to tell them that African-American twins may be available. They had never thought about twins, but now they faced the decision of adopting siblings. They said yes.

Another week passed before the adoption agency called to inform them that the twins had been born the previous day, July 26.

On July 28 the Sloots were aboard a plane and bound for their destination, which they asked to remain unknown. They spent 12 days away from home while Rachel remained in the hospital for observation, the result of being born over three weeks early. The new family arrived home on Aug. 9.

Among the questions the Sloots were asked during the adoption process was their openness to children of different racial or ethnic backgrounds. Both agreed they would welcome adopting a child of another race.

"I lived almost 35 years without children," said Vince. "I think I was a little bit afraid to step out, but when it really came down to it, I said I was open to whatever God had in store."

He said there was "some anxiety" about adopting a child from another race. "Not for myself, but for how they would be accepted in the community and what kind of support would there be from our family."

Those concerns were immediately allayed.

"The parish has been so supportive since the children came," said Kate, adding that people would line up after Mass waiting to see them. The twins still attract attention when the family is out in public. During last month's Fall Institute for Catholic educators at St. Joseph Church in Rice Lake, Kate was besieged by fellow catechists wanting to get a close look at the twins.

Not only have they been surprised by the community's support, said Vince, but the boundless love that he quickly found for the twins has been remarkable.

"As soon as we got these kids, for me, it was an immediate conversion," he said. "I didn't realize I could love somebody as much as I did these two kids. I still feel that today.

"A lot of things that were important to me before we had these kids have been pushed to the back burner. There's a lot of clarity for me now what God has called me to be -- it's to be a parent. He had a plan for us long ago to have these two kids. I really believe that. I feel so blessed that we were given these two kids."

The Sloots know that as their children grow they will have questions about their birth parents. They plan to be as open and honest as possible with them and plan to rely on God for guidance.

"I think that the whole idea that they're part of the family of God, that God created them, and that God meant for them to be in our family -- that will be a key thing for them (to understand and accept) being adopted," said Kate. "Because we know so clearly that they were meant for us, hopefully we'll be able to relay that to them and that will give them security to face (adversity)."

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© Superior Catholic Herald, 2000