By Paula Graham
Catholic Herald correspondent

Is tragedy God's fault? Speakers help
students ponder God's role in tragic events

TONY -- Is it God's fault when tragedy strikes? Is God punishing us for our sins? Is it OK to be mad at God? Does worrying do any good?" Fr. John Anderson posed these provocative questions to 60 high school religious education students and their catechists from Our Lady of Sorrows, Ladysmith; St. Anthony, Tony and St. Mary, Hawkins, at an Oct. 25 meeting.

"We hear about these things on television, but tonight we have two real people who have lived with tragedy," said Anderson in his introduction of guest speakers Ann Abel and Bill Rands. In a quiet, controlled voice, Abel spoke of her son Brian's suicide in 1998. This was the first time since his death that she was able to speak publicly about the crisis that left her in "shock and disbelief."

Brian was 24 when he took his life. He had been diagnosed with a chemical imbalance and hospitalized for three months. Abel visited him every day. Finally, he was discharged and sent home. "Without warning," said Abel, "things changed. Brian took his life. I was bitter with God and questioned his love. Why did God make me suffer?" she said. "I realize now that God had nothing to do with the hanging. But it still hurts."

At the time, Abel and her family did not belong to a church. With the help of a friend she was led to Anderson, who officiated at Brian's funeral. According to Abel, her family grieved as a "closed family" for a couple months. "It took six to seven months before I came to peace," she said. Friends and family sustained them during their grief. And the experience strengthened their faith lives.

When Sr. Cecile Kees invited Abel to attend church, she said yes. In September 1999 Abel and her husband Ken began attending RCIA classes. At the Easter Vigil last spring, Ken was baptized and the Abels were received into full communion at Our Lady of Sorrows.

Besides drawing her close to God, Abel says the tragedy was a learning experience on the human level. "We had lots of friends who were there for us." She told the group that people shouldn't worry about what to say to those who are suffering. "Just go and do it -- any goofy thing. Just be there," she said. As a result of her suffering, Abel says she is more considerate of other people in pain.

For Bill Rands, a fall from a tree almost four years ago radically changed his perspective about what is and what isn't a problem. Climbing to his deer stand on a raw November afternoon, Rands grabbed a weak branch and dropped 12 feet to the ground. "I knew when I hit the ground I was totally paralyzed," he said. Barely able to breathe he waited four hours face down in the snow and lowering darkness, wondering if he would freeze to death.

When the ambulance arrived at 7:30 p.m. Rands' body temperature registered 89 degrees. "I could barely talk. I knew I would be paralyzed, but I was glad to know I would live." Rands spent three months in an Eau Claire hospital before being transferred to Denver, where he was treated at a spinal rehabilitation unit. "When things got tough," he said, "I looked around at others and what they were going through. When people fight for life everyday, it puts things into perspective."

In his unit were a football player, policeman, rodeo champion and cheerleader, all victims of spinal injuries, all on ventilators, all people younger than himself. "I used to take so many things for granted. I don't take those things for granted anymore."

After two months in spinal rehab, Rands still had no movement. Against the advice of his American doctors, Rands risked experimental surgery in Argentina where a doctor transplanted nerves from his leg into his neck. Surgery went well. The recovery goes slowly.

One year after surgery, Rands still couldn't walk. Gradually he has regained partial use of his legs, and on this night, almost four years after his fall, Rands walked, with assistance, from the parking lot of St. Anthony to the parish hall. "It takes lots of therapy to be as functional as I am," said Rands, who estimates his body now operates at 20% of capacity. Rands hasn't lost faith that he will continue to regain use of his body.

Rands is thankful for his life, for the ability to talk and think, for each step he takes. "It was my decision to go up the tree. I don't blame God and I don't think I was being punished. It was an accident, plain and simple. My relationship with God was good, but now it is significantly stronger. I leave things up to him."

Rands challenged the students to look at what other kids are going through, especially when times get tough. "I know, growing up, there are things that bother you. But stop and think what you have -- friends, families, God."

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© Superior Catholic Herald, 2000